Socialising

Last night I went out to celebrate a friends birthday and I had a great time but it also got me to thinking about how things have changed.

10yrs ago I was such a different person I was still shy but I got over it and didn't let it hold me back. I had lots of friends and lots of people I talked too it was nice and I felt popular I guess you could say for the first time in my life I was actually someone.

When my daughters school first opened she was one of the foundation students so it was new for everyone and I met lots of people and joined the PTA and had a blast I was secretary for a couple of years too and it kept me busy. I knew all the teachers and I became a part of that school and I loved it.

Then when I got my depression 4yrs later it all changed and I withdrew and couldn't leave the house without having an anxiety attack and I stopped talking to people, I left the PTA and was back to feeling like a nobody again.

Over the last 10yrs I have made friends and I have lost friends and some I know why and other I have no idea why they stopped talking to me and I could drive myself nuts trying to figure it out but I don't need to do that I can put it behind me.

I know in the past I have been a very needy and negative person I just didn't know any different and I know over the years I have been a burden to people well it's time for change.

I am trying to make an effort to go out more even if it means being out of my comfort zone which it normally is but I always end up having a good time so it's time to stop being afraid and get out there and live life.

So when I went out last night I felt uneasy I was meeting new people but I ended up having a great night and who knows maybe I will make some new friends out of it anything is possible.

So I guess my message is to open that door to new things and allow yourself to have fun and try new things even if it scares you.

I plan to stop being a chicken and get out there and just do it :)